The New Nation - Internet Edition

Farizaa Sabreen

So, you think you have the situation under control with your youngster at home. Like every other parent, you've probably made sure your child has taken enough classes in school, college or varsity, loaded your teen with music or dance lessons that will look good on college resumes, and spent all your spare time driving them back and forth from games, debates and art competitions. No doubt, it's sheer philanthropy on your part that you want your child to do extremely well in life. Drugs and pre-marital sex are taboo.

Welcome to your youngsters world of lies, deception and brace yourselves - high school drugs and sex.

Over the months, numerous reports have been released chronicling the drug addiction of Bangladeshi youngsters. Yaba and ice are new drugs in Bangladesh and these are popular amongst Bangladeshi young generation. These drugs are a threat to the health, morality and vitality of youth. Police have recently arrested many men with Yaba tablets. According to the police source, "Most of the users are students of private universities, colleges and A- and O-level students."

Sadia (the names of persons have been changed upon request) is a senior at one of the best high schools in Gulshan. "My parents would be disgusted if they knew what actually happens at my school. I've attended a few parties and you will find a lot of girls getting drunk and many doing a 'freak dance'. This is a sexually provocative kind of dance," she explains.

Sadia says that like many other students, she too has perfected the art of "role play": "At home I'm the perfect daughter. I maintain my grades. Do all the chores I'm supposed to at home. I'm a good painter. Pray and do all my religious duties at the appropriate time. But outside home, I'm a totally different person," she reveals casually.

Though Sadia would not disclose if she were drug addicted or sexually active herself, she is willing to comment that her close friends at school are.

Sumit is a self-acclaimed drug addicted and he is studying at one of the highly rated private varsity in Banani. "In universities, most of the students have cell phones and they can call each other all the time. On a Thursday night, they might tell their parents that they want to study with other students, and these group study sessions can turn drug taking and sexual," he points out. Drug use and sexuality are most likely to occur on guest house or an 'open house'," which, he explains, is when a set of parents is out of town and the students, especially female students have the house to themselves.

Sumit also points out that many of his friends indulge in some form of sexual activity and drug while sitting in the car.

The root cause for the continuing deception on the part of these young lies in the conflict of values between them and their parents. Most parents believe in passing on long-held religious as well as Bangladeshi societal values to their children.

Sazzad Mostaq, a modern parent says he tries to have an open and friendly relationship with his children so they can come to him any time. "But I have made it clear to them that I don't approve of drug and pre-marital sex. Because these can ruin one's life," he says.

From music videos to even supposedly family and comedy shows, young people are portrayed on television these days as having relationships outside marriage and young generation are influenced by television shows.

Dr. Ramiz Mia points out that parents believe that, culturally, Bangladesh is still stuck in the '60s and '70s and expect the same thing from their children. What they don't understand is Bangladeshi culture has changed quite a bit, and at least in urban societies, it is a very modern culture - sometimes similar to the west. And parents need to adjust their expectations. Some parents acknowledge that they should get off their moral high horse "because it is not the end of the world anyway.